Written by Michelle

I grew up on a very beautiful, very hot island, a track of land full of people who love kissing, hugging and touching one another during everyday interactions. Individuals full of life who, just like the weather, are warm and like embracing each other. This isn’t odd to us. It’s expected.

When we see each other, we hug. When we greet each other, we kiss on the cheek. When we communicate, most of us reach out and touch each other. Why? Quite frankly, as a person who was raised this way, I actually ask myself, why not?  Therein lies the beauty of diversity. We’re all brought up differently. Through an array of practices, behaviors and expectations, we become who we are. Our differences make us unique and simply more beautiful.

My mother was integral in instilling these social values and practices in me. From greeting people, to appropriately looking them in the eye, she taught me the etiquette of being social. I remember her hovering behind me as a child when I had to put her practices to the test. She corrected me or commended me like moms do. Today, I’m proud to say that I am my mother’s daughter. And if you know me, I’ve probably hugged, kissed or touched your arm while we were talking. It’s part of me. It’s who I am.

I’d like to think I made my mother especially proud a few years back…

I was spending an overnight at our Nation’s Capital. Twenty four hours full of culture, diversity, history and high school fun. No, I wasn’t in high school, but along with a fellow colleague, I was chaperoning a National Honor Society trip.

As we meandered around the monuments in the glorious sunshine, we came across a crowd. We learned that there was a groundbreaking ceremony for a new memorial. It took us very little time to get excited, and we quickly got in line to see what the commotion was all about.

As is typical in DC, the place was lined with security. Security guards, police, dogs, wands, you name it! From tinted sunglasses to ear pieces, the men in black lined every space and corner. We assumed a high profile government figure was probably in attendance, so we filed in line to undergo all the security measures. We anticipated an opportunity of a lifetime.

There was a security screening process similar to those in an airport.

First we placed our back packs on the table to get checked. Security personnel went through our belongings and surveyed them. Then we were asked to place our cell phones and any other devices we were carrying on the table. Next, we stepped toward a guard. As I waited, I looked at the gentleman with sunglasses and an earpiece. I was anxious for my turn.

“Next!”

I looked happily at the Secret Service man who was standing two feet away from me. He looked at me. No polite smile, no words, no hello.

I patiently stared at his dark sunglasses, looking up at him like a little kid in need of direction. Mute to the world, he opened his arms in a T position.

I looked at my “friend” with a quizzical look. Really? I proceeded to do what my mother taught me and what all the years of practicing had prepared me to do. I took a deep breathe, looked him in the eyes/tinted sunglasses and…

I hugged him.

Yes. I HUGGED him.

As I stood there hugging him (please note my head was now on his chest), the man did not return the hug. Probably two seconds too late when he started patting me on the back is was when I realized that perhaps it wasn’t a hug that this gentleman was looking for.

Ahhhh! He was security. He didn’t want to hug me! He wanted to use his security wand and do his job to frisk me.

Crap.

At this point I started giggling. The Secret Service man laughed and he said to me: “You don’t get out often, do you?”

Ummmm…no; I guess I don’t. But I’m still laughing today.

***

I value my mother’s persistence, the years of hovering, commending, reprimanding and redirecting. Her love, her compassion and her patience in teaching me “paid off” in one split second. (At least, I think they did.)

No questions asked, no directing needed, I did what my heart and upbringing taught me to do. And although not the socially expected reaction, it warms my heart (okay, it makes me laugh too!) to think that the love she ingrained in me pushed me to hug that security guard .

There’s much to say about a hug. I guess it could have been the hot sun that day, but it was probably my mom. And I’m grateful that she taught me the true meaning and importance of a warm embrace.